A year concluded today, the first of many years that I am certain will always sting, no matter how much healing of wounds time is purportedly capable of.
I found my mind wandering from time to time, reflecting on how I spent the day before my world was rocked to its foundation. I wondered at all the unknowns, all of the “how was he feeling?” confusion. I remember the text message as I stood at today’s artist’s concert, certain it was the bad news, only to find it was my sick father just checking in. I was emotionally connected in such a powerful way that night, as I often am with live music. I tried so hard to relish life in his honour. I tried to be full of his vitality.
Contrary to Amanda’s words, I suffer late nights most of all. But no matter how much it hurts, we have to live. We have to try. I just wish I could get in a car instead, and drive…
Day Eighty-Two: Have To Drive – Amanda Palmer